On arthritis

I have just today been informed that I have arthritis in my hands. The Doc actually called it osteoarthritis. That’s a ten-dollar word for my hands don’t work worth a hoot anymore.  “What am I supposed to do now?” I asked the Doc. “Welcome to your 50’s” was all he said. Great guy, my doc. Always full of good news. Next thing he’ll tell me is I’m bald. Oh, wait. I already am.

This getting into one’s 50’s is not what it’s cracked up to be. Stuff either leaves altogether (like my hair has), quits working or works only sporadically, or just up and moves where it is not wanted (usually down or out but sometimes both).

I went bald years ago so really can’t blame that on the 50’s. Up until just recently, my hands have been pretty faithful. They have almost always done what I have asked them to do. The times that they did not got me into trouble. Anyway, they are now perpetually stiff and a little sore. I have noticed that they get worse when the weather changes so maybe I’ll be like that proverbial old guy at the barber shop that  stands up, looks around, and says “My old bones are aching – reckon it’s gonna rain.” I figure I’ll need to get some bib overalls or something like that to go along with my newly acquired weather forecasting skill. Images of Walter Brennan and The Real McCoys come to mind. The fact that I know and remember Walter Brennan is very scary.

The Doc did not offer me much hope for my hands. They are pretty important to me and I want to keep them as long as I can. I decided that I needed to do some research on the subject in the hope of finding a cure that did not involve death. I heard that Glucosamine / Chondroitin is useful in lessening the effects of arthritis so I bought some of that. It’s expensive stuff you know. The instructions tell me I have to take three a day for maybe 2 months before I can expect anything resembling a cure.  I guess they want to make sure they get their investment back before I figure out I can’t afford it.

I was told that warm weather is beneficial too. I thought that the wife and I could move somewhere that’s always warm but she reminded me that those places have lots of people with less working parts than me. That just did not sit well with me so I decided I would just stay right here “back home” in Indiana. I can fall apart here as well as anywhere else thank you so much.

My partner at work told me that his mom had this malady and wore a copper bracelet to ward off the effects of arthritis. She actually swore by this method, it being the only one she would ever employ. Having just heard of this ancient cure, I have not had the opportunity to try it. I will do so at my first opportunity and update you when I have sufficiently tested it.

In the hope of giving the benefit of my experience in treating this ailment, I will, from time to time, write something here as an update for you dear friend. Until then….

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